So I suppose in this scenario, I’m the Cat.
My wife and I were standing in line at the movies discussing the little we knew about the movie we were going to see. We’d set out to see another movie but as we approached the marquis we realized we’d gotten the theaters wrong. No problem, we’ll adapt. So now we’re trying to piece together what little we know about “The Good Liar.” I’m sure it’s a spy film so I’m game since I spend far too much time reading old Tom Clancy novels. We both like Hellen Mirren so it seems all is not lost. But while we’re in the queue waiting, the two women in front of us are having a conversation. They’re facing us so it’s hard not to overhear every word.
Woman 1: I’m not sure I have time for this.
Woman 2: Why, what’s wrong?
1: Well, I’m on call until 11pm.
2: You could leave if you get called.
1: Well, there’s been a critical incident and I very well may.
O.K. So if they were facing the other way I would have never gotten involved but since she’s looking right at me as she’s mentioning a critical incident the Cat gets curious.
We had noticed on the walk to the theater that one whole block of a main artery in our little neighborhood had been blocked off and there were police cars everywhere. If this was New York City or even any city we probably wouldn’t have given it a second thought. But it’s a small town where you rarely even notice the police so the Cat says, “We noticed the street was blocked off. Do you know what happened?”
Now the weird part. She looked right at me and gave me, “the Cat” in this scenario, both a look of tremendous disdain followed by the “cat who ate the canary” look of satisfaction followed by silence toward me as if I didn’t exist. She then resumed her conversation, still looking right at me. Wait, I thought, I was the Cat in this analogy but you’ve replaced my curious Cat with your superior canary eater in this revolving game of feline felony. I was surprised she didn’t start with a sing song, “I know something you don’t know.”
So now it’s terribly awkward. I feel like a jerk. Clearly this tremendously important civil servant has been put in the terrible situation of being asked about state secrets that only she can know by the all too curious, soon to be dead Cat. But I had to ask, and of course my embarrassment is only exacerbated by my anger at being in this situation. I’m really not a busy body and she was looking right at me. So now I’m pissed and embarrassed and as this analogy requires, dead. She, deciding that the chances of her being called in to save multiple lives since this hush hush critical incident is imminent, announces (still looking right at me) that she’s leaving and will catch up with her confidante after the movie. Unless, of course, she’s up to her elbows in blood, and with that she’s off to save the world. I’m left looking at my wife wondering what the hell just happened and how I had so innocently been murdered. Fortunately, cats have nine lives. Next time I’ll mind my own business. Meow!